machadao

You look like a fried meatball in a clown costume.

I saw you at the gym. You’re like a cow who just ate a whole pizza.

You walk in, and the whole room goes silent. Like they’re all waiting for you to start a war.

You’re like a blubber bomb that exploded in a fancy suit.

You walk in, and it’s like the universe just gave up.

You eat a whole cake for breakfast and still think you’re thin.

You’re like a food coma that’s got a megaphone.

You eat so much, you could feed a whole family and still be full.

You talk so much, it’s like you’re trying to drown us in words.