Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

A laptop so slow it makes you want to throw it out the window and hope it hits your boss.

My lagtop takes longer to open Chrome than it does to get dressed for work.

I tried to watch a video and it took five minutes just to load the first frame.

My lagtop is like a sloth on a treadmill. Slow. Really slow.

2

A laptop so broken it thinks it's a toaster and tries to burn your files.

I clicked a button and it took so long I started eating my lunch before it finished.

My lagtop is so slow it made my coffee go cold.

I sent a message and it took longer to show up than my ex's reply.

3

A laptop that takes longer to start than your mom takes to finish her coffee.

I turned it on and by the time it loaded I had already had my first cigarette.

My lagtop is like a snail with a broken shell. It moves, but it’s not fast.

I opened a file and it took so long I started wondering if it was even going to open.

4

A laptop so old it thinks it’s a fossil and can’t even remember how to run.

I tried to open a document and it took longer than my gym class.

My lagtop is older than my grandpa’s beard.

It took so long to load I started to doubt if it was even going to work.

5

A laptop that takes longer to do anything than your dog takes to forget you.

I opened a program and it took longer than my dog took to forget I was there.

My lagtop is slower than my cousin’s internet on a bad day.

I tried to play a game and it took so long I could’ve finished my homework.

6

A laptop so slow it’s like watching paint dry, but with more swearing.

My lagtop is slower than my teacher’s internet on a Monday.

I tried to open a file and it took longer than my dad’s stories.

It takes my lagtop longer to boot up than it does for me to get ready for school.