Lagpacaning

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4 views · Added 9d ago · 6 definitions

1
When you swear on your mom's grave you'll show up, then vanish like a fart in a windstorm.
I said I'd be there for the party, then I went to sleep and forgot about it.
He promised to help me move, then texted me 'I'm out' 10 minutes before the truck arrived.
She told me she'd bring the pizza, then I ended up eating expired chips from 2015.
2
When you lie so hard your nose grows, then disappear like a bad haircut.
He said he'd finish the project by Friday, then I saw him eating tacos on Saturday.
She told me she'd text me back, then I had to call her mom to find out where she was.
He said he'd show up to the wedding, then I saw him at the bar with his ex.
3
When you're so lazy you'd rather die than do the thing you promised.
He said he'd come over, then I found out he was still in bed at noon.
She said she'd show up to the meeting, then I saw her in the lobby of a movie theater.
He said he'd help me clean my room, then I found him eating cereal at 2 in the morning.
4
When you make a deal with the devil and then the devil shows up with a side of betrayal.
He said he'd come to the game, then I saw him eating a burger at the mall.
She said she'd help me study, then I found her on TikTok at 10 PM.
He said he'd bring the cake, then I got a plate of burnt toast.
5
When you talk big, then you run like a scared chicken when the moment hits.
He said he'd fight me, then ran out when I showed up.
She said she'd finish the project, then I found her watching Netflix.
He said he'd bring the drinks, then I showed up with a soda from the vending machine.
6
When you're so unreliable you're like a broken toaster that only works sometimes.
He said he'd come over, then I found him at the park with his dog.
She said she'd help me, then I found her eating pizza at 3 in the morning.
He said he'd show up, then I found him watching YouTube at 11 AM.
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