Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

a guy so slow and dumb he probably thinks a lactating turtle is a fancy way to get free pizza.

Bro, you’re slower than a lactating turtle on a Sunday morning.

He walked past the lactating turtle and still didn’t notice it.

That guy is a lactating turtle in a suit.

2

a guy so fat he probably thinks a lactating turtle is a personal trainer.

That guy’s so fat, he’s like a lactating turtle on a diet.

He eats like a lactating turtle at a buffet.

He tried to bench press a lactating turtle and failed.

3

a guy who tries so hard to get laid he probably thinks a lactating turtle is a dating app.

He texted a lactating turtle like it was a dating app.

He tried to flirt with a lactating turtle and got rejected.

He asked a lactating turtle for a date and got laughed at.

4

a fagot who probably thinks a lactating turtle is a fashion statement.

He wore a lactating turtle shirt like it was a luxury brand.

He thinks a lactating turtle is the new trend.

He tried to be cool by wearing a lactating turtle hat.

5

a guy who thinks he’s smart but is actually a lactating turtle in disguise.

He thinks he’s smart but he’s just a lactating turtle in a suit.

He argues with a lactating turtle like it’s a debate.

He thinks he’s better than a lactating turtle and he’s not.