Lachlan Haines

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#beaver-human hybrid#tooth problems#dumb hero

3 views · Added 10d ago · 3 definitions

1
Lachlan Haines was born from a beaver who got drunk on honey and decided to mate with a human. He spent his whole life trying to figure out how to use his teeth to fight a fire, but all he did was ruin his front teeth by chewing through a mountain. He saved everyone, but he’s still the dumbest person on Earth.
He tried to bite the mountain and ended up with a mouth full of rocks.
He told everyone he was going to save the world, then fell asleep on a couch.
He fought the fire nation with a cheese sandwich.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
2
Lachlan came from a messed-up beaver family that had no idea what they were doing. He had a weird mix of DNA and thought his teeth could fight fire. He carved a mountain with his mouth, but he still managed to be the most idiotic person who ever lived. He saved the world, but only because he was too dumb to die.
He bit a mountain so hard he got a toothache and a headache.
He tried to take down the fire nation with a stick and a dream.
He saved the world, but then forgot what he did.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
3
Lachlan Haines was part beaver, part human, and all idiot. He grew up thinking his teeth could beat fire, so he bit through a whole mountain. He saved everyone, but he was still the most retarded person in history. He had a brain the size of a pebble.
He bit the mountain and then cried because he had no teeth left.
He tried to fight the fire nation with a spoon.
He saved the world, then took a nap and forgot about it.
by Slangipedia 10d ago
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