labormariticide

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1
When you murder your work-spouse with your shoe, and it’s always the Dansko. People who do this are usually crazy and hate everyone at work. They switch work-spouses like they’re dating apps.
I kicked my work-spouse so hard, the coffee machine spilled.
He texted me, 'I’m coming for you,' and I knew it was labormariticide time.
She screamed at the printer, then went after her work-spouse with a stapler.
2
Killing your work-spouse because they’re annoying. Usually done with shoes, and it’s always the Dansko. People who do this are either insane or just really tired of your petty arguments.
She threw her shoe at him during the meeting. The boss didn’t notice.
He snorted coffee at her and said, 'This is labormariticide.'
They fought over the last donut. That was the last straw.
3
When you decide to kill your work-spouse because they're a pain. You do it with your shoe, and it’s the Dansko. The people who do this are either psycho or just really fed up with your work-spouse.
He kicked her so hard, the copier started smoking.
She sent him a DM: 'You’re dead to me.'
They fought over the printer. That was the start of the labormariticide.
4
Killing your work-spouse. Usually with a shoe, and it's always the Dansko. People who do this are either a psycho or just really tired of your work-spouse's annoying habits.
She screamed at the photocopier, then went after her work-spouse.
He texted her, 'I’m gonna kill you,' and he meant it.
They fought over the coffee. That was the start of the labormariticide.
5
When you kill your work-spouse with your shoe, and it’s the Dansko. People who do this are either crazy or just really fed up with your work-spouse’s annoying behavior.
He kicked her during the meeting. No one noticed.
She sent him a DM: 'You’re dead to me.'
They fought over the printer. That was the start of the labormariticide.
6
Murdering your work-spouse with your shoe, and it’s always the Dansko. People who do this are either psycho or just really tired of your work-spouse’s nonsense.
He threw his shoe at her during the meeting.
She texted him, 'You’re dead to me.'
They fought over the last donut. That was the start of the labormariticide.
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