labophile

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1 views · Added 1d ago · 3 definitions

1
A labophile is someone who gets a hard-on from writing lab reports. They type with one hand and jerk off with the other. They can type one-handed better than most people can type with both hands.
I skipped the party to finish my lab report. My mom thinks I'm studying. I'm really just thinking about my GPA and my boner.
My lab report is so good, my teacher thinks I did the experiment. I just copied the numbers from my brother's report. And I still got a hard-on.
I wrote my lab report during lunch. My friends thought I was eating. I was really typing with one hand and eating with the other. And I got a boner.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
2
A labophile is a person who can’t wait to write lab reports. They’d rather do that than eat, drink, or have sex. They are obsessed with lab reports like a junkie is obsessed with drugs.
I got a text from my labophile friend: 'I’m doing a lab report. I skipped the movie. I got a burger. I didn’t eat it. I just stared at it while I typed.'
My labophile cousin came to my birthday party. He sat in the corner and wrote a lab report. He didn’t eat cake. He didn’t talk to anyone. He just wrote and got a boner.
My labophile neighbor doesn’t even go to work. He sits in his pajamas and writes lab reports. He’s got a boner and a full report on the periodic table.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
3
A labophile is a person who loves lab reports more than food, sex, and their mom. They can write a report while eating, while watching TV, while thinking about sex, and still get a hard-on.
I texted my labophile friend: 'You just did a lab report while eating pizza. You didn’t even notice the cheese was melting. You just got a boner.'
My labophile brother came to my house. He didn’t eat. He didn’t talk. He just wrote a report. He got a boner and a full report on the pH scale.
I saw my labophile cousin at the mall. He was writing a report while shopping. He didn’t buy anything. He just got a boner and a full report on the reaction time.
by Slangipedia 1d ago
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