la juda

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The pigs in blue who think they're gods and always give you a ticket for no reason

I got a ticket for parking next to a fire hydrant. The cop didn't even check the hydrant was broken.

They pulled me over for driving 10 mph over the limit. I was going to a funeral.

I got a ticket for eating a taco while driving. The cop said it was a distraction. I said it was a food distraction.

The cops who think they're the only ones with a brain and will stop you for no reason at all

They stopped me for changing lanes without signaling. I was in a rush to get to the bathroom.

I was doing 55 in a 45 zone. They said I was a menace to society.

They pulled me over because I had a bald spot. They said it was a crime.

The cops who think they're the kings of the road and will ticket you just for breathing

I got a ticket for not wearing a seatbelt. I was wearing a helmet. The cop said it didn't count.

They gave me a ticket for driving with one hand. I was holding a cup. The cop said it was a disgrace.

They stopped me for not blinking fast enough. I said I was tired. They said I was a hazard.