Kaila Lacey

She showed up to the party in a tank top and a bootie. I thought I was at a clown convention.

My cousin asked her why she wore a bootie to the grocery store. She said it was for 'aerodynamic reasons.'

She tried to explain to me that a bootie is a lifestyle. I called her a bootie-bro.

At the mall, she told me she was a legend. I told her she was a bootie legend.

She wore a bootie to a battle. I said she was ready for war. She said she was ready for a bootie war.

She posted a photo of her bootie and called it 'the ultimate legend.' I called it 'the ultimate disaster.'

She said she was a goddess. I said she was a bootie goddess. She said that was a title of honor.

She walked into the church wearing a bootie and said she was bringing the bootie to heaven.

She tried to pray in the bootie. I said she was doing a bootie ritual.