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He’s a chucklehead who never shuts up, can’t run faster than a sloth, and thinks watching sports is the same as being in the game. He’s your best friend, but he’ll swear at you if you don’t laugh at his jokes.
He texted me at 2 AM just to tell me he watched the whole game and still didn’t understand why the ref didn’t let the guy play.
He tried to run in the gym and got out of breath after 10 seconds. He still called me a ‘slowpoke’.
He told me he’d never let me down, then forgot my birthday and called me a ‘disappointment’.