Kachunkulator

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the thing you throw at your dad when he won't change the channel

I threw the kachunkulator at him because he kept watching cat videos.

My brother used the kachunkulator as a weapon in the remote war.

I called my mom and said, 'Dad's holding the kachunkulator hostage!'

a magical device that makes your life easier, until it breaks and you scream

I was happy until the kachunkulator stopped working and I had to watch the news.

The kachunkulator died and I cried like a baby.

I tried to fix the kachunkulator and now the TV is broken too.

the only thing that stands between you and a lifetime of watching commercials

Without the kachunkulator, I’d be stuck watching ads forever.

I used the kachunkulator to escape the horror movie.

My sister stole my kachunkulator and I had to watch the whole show.

a remote control that sometimes works, sometimes doesn't, and always makes you mad

The kachunkulator worked once, then it just died on me.

I pressed every button on the kachunkulator and it still wouldn't change the channel.

The kachunkulator was a mess, and I was a mess too.

the thing you blame when your favorite show gets interrupted by something stupid

I blamed the kachunkulator when the pizza delivery came on TV.

The kachunkulator failed me during the best part of the movie.

I yelled at the kachunkulator because it let the news in.

a tiny remote control that thinks it's the boss of the TV

The kachunkulator told me I had to watch the weather.

The kachunkulator didn't listen when I said 'turn it off!'

The kachunkulator was too proud to let me change the channel.