K-lagging

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A girl who scrubs the testicles clean for her own enjoyment and your misery.

She’s the reason I have a face wash and a mop.

I asked her what she did for fun. She said, 'I scrub.'

She’s the only person who can make a shower feel like a war.

A girl who shaves the testicles to make them look good for her own twisted pleasure.

She turned my shower into a grooming session.

She said, 'I don’t just clean them. I style them.'

I walked in and she was holding a razor like it was a sword.

A girl who licks the testicles clean because she thinks it’s a kind of love.

She said she was 'doing her duty.' I said, 'Duty? I'm dying.'

I came home to find her licking the testicles like they were a pizza.

She called it 'the ultimate affection.' I called it 'the worst date ever.'