K - Day

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1
K-Day is a fake holiday made by greedy retailers to trick you into buying more books than you need, and it’s also a sneaky way to try to get you to care about Kwanzaa, which is for people who aren’t cool.
My teacher said K-Day is just Xmas with a fancy name. I said, 'It’s just Xmas with a K and a fancy name.'
My mom tried to make me buy a book for K-Day. I said, 'I don’t need a book. I need a snack.'
My friend’s K-Day gift was a book about Kwanzaa. He cried. I laughed.
2
A K-day is when someone has lived 1000 days, and that’s like being 3 years old but with extra math and a party that no one asked for.
My cousin had her 13th K-day and cried because she had to do math problems.
My brother said, 'I don’t care about K-days. I care about pizza.'
My dog had a K-day. I threw a party. He ate the cake.
3
K-Day is like Xmas but with a K, and some people think it’s from some weird Jewish tradition about not writing Xs on legal papers, which is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.
My teacher said K-Day is like Xmas but with a K. I said, 'It’s like Xmas with a K and a bad grade.'
My mom tried to explain K-Day to me. I said, 'Just give me Xmas.'
My friend’s K-Day gift was a paper. I said, 'That’s not a gift. That’s a grade.'
4
K-Day is when you have to buy something for someone whose name starts with a K, and you can’t say no, even if you’re mad and it’s October 4th.
My friend’s name starts with a K. I had to buy him a pizza. I didn’t want to.
My cousin’s name starts with a K. I had to buy her a book. She cried.
My brother’s name starts with a K. I had to buy him a snack. He ate it.
5
K-Day is when K-pop fans go wild and you have to listen to 'Epiphany' at exactly 23:59:13 on December 31st, or else you will be cursed for the whole year.
I had to listen to 'Epiphany' on K-Day. I said, 'Why? I’m not a K-pop fan.'
My friend said, 'I had to listen to 'Epiphany' on K-Day. I cried.'
My mom said, 'I had to listen to 'Epiphany' on K-Day. I said, 'I hate K-pop.'
6
K-Day is when you get to talk trash about Xbox on August 10th, and everyone knows it’s dodo day, so you don’t even have to be nice.
I talked trash about Xbox on K-Day. I said, 'Xbox is dodo.'
My friend talked trash about Xbox on K-Day. He said, 'Xbox is dodo.'
My mom talked trash about Xbox on K-Day. She said, 'Xbox is dodo.'
7
K-Day is when you get to beat up K-pop fans on December 1st, and they can’t move or run away, which is the best day of the year for people who hate K-pop.
I beat up a K-pop fan on K-Day. He said, 'I hate K-pop.'
My friend beat up a K-pop fan on K-Day. He said, 'I hate K-pop.'
My brother beat up a K-pop fan on K-Day. He said, 'I hate K-pop.'
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