Jacob Neithercoat

Jacob walked in, and my mom said, 'I’ve seen hotter legends, but not this hot.'

My dad cried when he saw Jacob at the mall. He said, 'That’s my future.'

Jacob showed up, and my dog ran away. He said, 'That’s not a man, that’s a legend.'

My ex saw Jacob and said, 'I should’ve dated him instead of you.'

My crush fainted when Jacob said hi. He said, 'That’s not a greeting, that’s a spell.'

Jacob walked by, and my crush said, 'I think I just got a heart attack.'

My dog licked Jacob’s hand like it was the last meal on Earth.

My cat purred so loud, the neighbors came to check if there was a fire.

Jacob walked in, and my dog said, 'That’s not a man, that’s a legend.'