Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

Sitting there like a king, jacking off all day, no one else matters.

I didn’t leave my bed today. Just me and my hand.

My mom knocked on my door. I said, 'Go away, I’m busy.'

I had a meeting at 3 PM. I skipped it. Still jacking off.

2

You don’t get up. You don’t eat. You just jack off like it’s your job.

I didn’t even brush my teeth today. I just jacked off and went to sleep.

My dad called me. I said, 'Tell me I’m not dreaming.'

I missed my train. Still jacked off.

3

You’re so busy jacking off, you forget to live.

I didn’t even drink water today. Just me and my hand.

I forgot my birthday. I was too busy jacking off.

My friend came over. I said, 'I’m not talking to you. I’m jacking off.'

4

You jack off so much, your hand gets tired and says, 'No more.'

I jacked off so much, my hand was sore for two days.

I had to stop because my hand was crying.

I jacked off so much, I had to take a break and eat a sandwich.

5

You don’t care about anything else. Just you and your hand.

My dog barked at me. I said, 'Shut up, I’m jacking off.'

I didn’t answer my phone. I was too busy jacking off.

I skipped school. I just jacked off all day.

6

You jack off so much, people start to worry about you.

My brother came in and said, 'You’re going to die from jacking off.'

My mom sent me a message: 'Eat something, you’re going to get sick.'

My friend texted me: 'You’re like a robot. Just jacking off all day.'