Jaboo Freeny

My cousin tried to eat a whole pizza by himself. His friend said, 'You’re a fool, man!'

My sister tried to sing in the shower. Her brother shouted, 'You sound like a dying goat!'

My dog tried to chase a vacuum cleaner. My mom yelled, 'That dog is a disaster!'

My brother tried to ride a bike without training wheels. His friend flipped him the bird and said, 'You’re a total dork!'

My neighbor tried to mow the lawn at 2 a. m. I gave him the finger and said, 'You’re a mess!'

My dad tried to dance in a grocery store. My mom gave him the finger and said, 'You’re embarrassing me!'

My friend tried to do a magic trick and failed. I said, 'You’re the worst magician ever!'

My sister tried to tell a joke that was not funny. Her brother said, 'That joke is the worst ever!'

My dog tried to bark at a cloud. My mom said, 'That dog is the most ridiculous thing ever!'

My cousin tried to wear socks with sandals. His friend yelled, 'You’re a total mess!'

My brother tried to eat soup with a fork. His sister said, 'You’re the worst eater ever!'

My dog tried to eat my homework. I screamed, 'You’re a total disaster!'

My friend tried to play chess with his feet. I said, 'You’re the worst player ever!'

My sister tried to write with her toes. Her brother said, 'You’re the worst writer ever!'

My dog tried to chew my phone. My mom said, 'You’re the worst pet ever!'

My cousin tried to run a marathon in pajamas. His friend said, 'You’re a total fool!'

My brother tried to cook a pizza with a hammer. His sister said, 'You’re the worst cook ever!'

My dog tried to talk to a squirrel. My mom said, 'You’re the most absurd pet ever!'