J4FK

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A god among men who makes everyone look like a crying baby

J4FK walked in and the whole room shut up like a bunch of scared ants.

I saw J4FK eat a taco and now I’m jealous of the taco.

J4FK just texted me and said 'You’re gonna die', and I believe him.

The only person who could make a boring day turn into a full-blown riot

J4FK started a fight over a soda and now the whole school is in on it.

I was napping and J4FK came in and screamed my name like I owed him money.

J4FK made my math teacher cry, and math teachers don’t cry.

A human who could beat up a dragon and still have energy for a dance party

J4FK took down three bullies at once and still had time to laugh at me.

J4FK ran a marathon and then texted me like it was nothing.

J4FK fought a chicken in the parking lot and won, and it was just for fun.