j2muzic

2 views · Added 2d ago · 6 definitions

J2muzic is a shady company that throws DJs, VJs, and MCs at your event like they’re confetti and your budget is a joke.

My cousin’s wedding had 3 DJs and 2 VJs. J2muzic called it a "package deal."

They showed up with a boombox and a karaoke machine. I thought it was a funeral.

The MC kept talking about my aunt’s ex like he was paid to.

J2muzic pushes music like it’s a kid in a cafeteria and they’re trying to make sure no one forgets it.

My mixtape got promoted so hard, my mom’s friends thought it was a new religion.

They promoted my song to every gym, every gas station, and my uncle’s church.

My track played during a football game. I got 200 likes and 1 death threat.

J2muzic throws concerts like they’re throwing a fit and everyone is invited.

They booked a concert in my school gym. I had to sit through it like it was a test.

They brought a full band, a singer, and a guy who did fire tricks. I got a burn on my leg.

The concert was so loud, my dog ran away and joined a band.

J2muzic manages artists like they’re kids in a group home and social media is their therapy.

My artist got 10,000 followers. J2muzic called it a "breakthrough."

They posted my artist’s face 50 times a day. I thought he was being haunted.

They posted a picture of him eating pizza. It went viral. Now he’s famous for that.

J2muzic brands stuff like they’re trying to sell a lie to a kid who just got kicked out of school.

They branded my mixtape with a logo that looked like a sock. I thought it was a fashion statement.

They hyped my song so much, my neighbors thought it was a new religion.

They put my face on a poster and it looked like I was being tortured.

J2muzic does everything like they’re trying to make your life a horror movie and you’re the main character.

They did a photoshoot for me. It took 5 hours and I got 3 burns.

They did a mixtape promotion online. My song got played 10,000 times. My mom got a migraine.

They did a concert. It was loud, it was messy, and it felt like a war.