Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

The point where you’re so wasted you might as well be dead. You need someone to drag you out of the sewer and back to the living world.

I woke up in a ditch with a stranger’s sock in my mouth.

I tried to dance with a mailbox and got kicked out of the bar.

I told my mom I was going to college and she said, 'You’re going to the morgue.'

2

So drunk you think you’re a superhero. You try to save the world by throwing up on the principal’s face.

I took down three cops and a vending machine.

I tried to kiss the ceiling and got stuck there.

I got a traffic ticket for yelling at a stoplight.

3

You’re so drunk you forget your own name. You also forget your pants. And your dignity.

I walked into a church and asked the priest if he had any beer.

I tried to fight a cop and he just laughed and said, 'You’re already under arrest.'

I sat on a pizza and it screamed for help.

4

You’re so wasted you think you’re a wizard. You cast spells by spitting on the floor and yelling at the moon.

I turned my friend into a sandwich and he didn’t like it.

I tried to levitate and fell into a lake.

I told my dog he was the devil and he ran away.

5

You’re so drunk you can’t tell the difference between a friend and a fire hydrant. You tackle both.

I fought a fire hydrant and lost.

I tried to hug my friend and ended up hugging a wall.

I yelled at my mom and she yelled back and I got confused.

6

You’re so wasted you think you’re a rockstar. You sing at the top of your lungs and the neighbors call the cops.

I sang karaoke and the mic fell off my face.

I tried to play guitar with my toes and it didn’t work.

I got a standing ovation from my dog and a warning from my dad.