J-bedes

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When a person eats like a garbage truck and is basically one step away from needing a wheelchair and a diabetes shot.

My cousin is a J-bedes. He eats pizza for breakfast and calls it a snack.

My neighbor’s dog is healthier than him. That’s saying something.

He tried to run a marathon and collapsed like a bad movie.

A human who eats so much junk food they might as well be a walking snack bag with a heart attack waiting in the wings.

My mom says I’m a J-bedes in training. I don’t know if that’s a compliment or a curse.

He eats donuts for dinner and calls it a lifestyle.

He once ate an entire cake in one sitting and didn’t even blink.

A person so lazy and messy they probably got diabetes from being too tired to brush their teeth.

My brother’s room looks like a tornado hit it. He’s a J-bedes for sure.

He eats chips out of the bag like it’s his last meal.

He once forgot to eat for a week and called it a ‘detox.’

A human who’s basically a snack bar with legs and a doctor’s bill.

I’m a J-bedes and proud. I eat ice cream for lunch and call it a power move.

He eats so much candy he’s got a sugar high every day.

He once ate a whole bag of pretzels in one go and cried because it was so good.

A person who eats like they’re being chased by a bear and will probably die from a heart attack in a bakery.

My friend is a J-bedes. He eats donuts for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

He once ate a pizza so big it fell on the floor.

He tried to eat a whole cake and got stuck in the chair.

A human who eats so much they might as well be a walking snack machine with a doctor’s bill attached.

My neighbor is a J-bedes. He eats chips for dinner and calls it a ‘healthy choice.’

He once ate a whole bag of candy and passed out.

He eats so much he probably got diabetes from being too full to move.