I'll eat my hat

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A promise so strong it makes your hat taste like poop and your confidence like a full-course meal.

I'll eat my hat if this kid passes algebra. I've seen dragons do better.

I'll eat my hat before I let you call me 'babe' one more time.

I'll eat my hat if this pizza isn't the best I've ever had. I'm not even lying.

A way of saying something will never happen, not even if God himself decides to take a nap.

I'll eat my hat if you ever clean your room. Not even the devil could make you do that.

I'll eat my hat if this project is done on time. I've seen time die before.

I'll eat my hat if you stop talking in class. I've seen rocks talk more than you.