I suggest you get off my roof before I ignite your frilly, red pants

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4 views · Added 12d ago · 3 definitions

1
A loud, angry warning to someone who’s trespassing on your roof, and you’re not afraid to burn their fancy pants to ash.
Your neighbor is currently standing on your roof like it’s a trampoline. You throw a match at them and yell this.
You see a kid trying to sneak into your house through the roof. You light a cigarette and say this.
Your friend’s dog is on your roof eating your shingles. You throw a flaming sock at them and say this.
2
A fiery threat you yell at someone who won’t leave your roof, and you’re seriously thinking about burning their fashion sense.
Your cousin is on your roof eating your breakfast. You yell this and throw a flaming pancake at them.
You see a guy on your roof stealing your Christmas lights. You light a fire and say this.
Your ex is on your roof and you’re too mad to just throw them off. You yell this and set their scarf on fire.
3
A warning you shout at someone who’s ruining your roof, and you’re not holding back when it comes to burning their fancy pants.
You catch your kid’s friend on your roof and you yell this while lighting a fire in the backyard.
A delivery person is on your roof and you’re too annoyed to just let them go. You yell this and set their bag on fire.
Your friend is on your roof and you’re too mad to just throw them off. You yell this and burn their favorite pair of pants.
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