I never asked

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You say this when someone’s brain is so fried it can’t even remember you said something stupid

'I never asked you to clean my room!' said my brother after I told him I’d never asked him to clean my room.

'I never asked you to feed my goldfish!' I yelled at my mom after I fed her goldfish for a month.

'I never asked you to be my best friend!' said my ex after I broke up with him three times.

You use it when someone acts like you gave them a million tasks when you only said one thing

'I never asked you to bring me coffee every day!' I said after my coworker brought me coffee for a month.

'I never asked you to take my dog to the park!' my dad said when I took his dog to the park 10 times.

'I never asked you to be my boyfriend!' my crush said after I asked him out three times.

You say it when someone’s so confused they think you’re talking about something else entirely

'I never asked you to wear my hat to school!' I said when my friend wore my hat to school every day.

'I never asked you to write my essay!' my brother said when I wrote his essay for him 12 times.

'I never asked you to be my pet!' my dog said when I dressed him up like a clown.

You use it when someone is so dumb they forget what you just told them

'I never asked you to pay my bills!' I said after my mom paid my bills for a year.

'I never asked you to be my teacher!' my friend said after I taught him math for two weeks.

'I never asked you to be my therapist!' my brother said after I talked to him for hours about his problems.

You say this when someone thinks you’re giving them a hard time when you’re actually being nice

'I never asked you to be my friend!' I said after I hung out with him every day.

'I never asked you to be my boss!' my coworker said after I worked for him for a year.

'I never asked you to be my pet!' my cat said after I dressed him up for a party.