I like talking to girls

You’re at the mall. I’m texting you: 'Why are you talking to that guy? He looks like he just lost his dog and his job.'

You’re at the bar. I whisper: 'Don’t even think about talking to that guy. He smells like regret.'

You’re at the park. I send you a snap: 'You’re out here talking to guys? I’m over here flirting with the hot barista.'

You’re at the diner. I say: 'Why are you talking to that guy? He’s like the last slice of pizza. Bland and sad.'

You’re at the gym. I text you: 'Don’t even look at that guy. He’s got the face of a guy who just got rejected by his ex and her new boyfriend.'

You’re at the movie theater. I whisper: 'You’re talking to a guy? I’m out here texting my crush.'

You’re at the store. I text: 'Don’t talk to that guy. I’ve got my girl squad watching me.'

You’re at the party. I tell you: 'I’m not talking to that guy. My girls are giving me high fives over here.'

You’re on the bus. I say: 'I’m not even looking at that guy. My girl squad is giving me vibes.'