i got shooters

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When you have people yapping at you about stuff that went down

My cousin said he saw me eat a whole pizza by myself. I didn’t even know he was there.

My mom texted me during a test and said she saw me fail.

My homie told me he saw me sleep through my alarm. I was just pretending I was dead.

When people talk your ear off about stuff that actually happened

My brother told me he saw me cry at a movie. I was just sad the superhero died.

My dad said he saw me eat 10 hot dogs. I only ate 7, but I was full.

My friend told me he saw me fail a math test. I passed, but I was tired.

When people keep telling you about things you did, even if they didn’t see it

My aunt said she saw me eat a whole cake. I was just eating the frosting.

My cousin told me he saw me fail the test. I passed, but I was distracted.

My friend said he saw me sleep through my alarm. I was just pretending I was a zombie.

When you have people who just won’t stop telling you about stuff you did

My brother said he saw me eat a whole pizza. I only ate half, but I was full.

My mom said she saw me cry during a movie. I was just sad the villain won.

My homie said he saw me fail the test. I passed, but I was tired.

When people keep saying stuff you did, even if they were not there

My cousin said he saw me eat a whole cake. I only ate the frosting.

My dad said he saw me fail the test. I passed, but I was distracted.

My friend said he saw me sleep through my alarm. I was just pretending I was a ghost.

When people talk your ear off about stuff that actually happened, but you’re not listening

My brother said he saw me eat a whole pizza. I was just full.

My mom said she saw me cry during a movie. I was just sad.

My friend said he saw me fail the test. I passed, but I was tired.