I can't do two things at once

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A basic truth that men know but women pretend to not know and then prove wrong every single day.

Trying to text and eat a whole pizza while watching a movie. It's impossible. You're a failure.

Trying to talk to your crush and remember your math homework. Both are impossible. You're a disaster.

Trying to drink coffee and not spill it while walking. It's a war. You lose.

The most basic rule of life that women refuse to believe in and then laugh at you when you fail at it.

Trying to eat breakfast and text your mom. You drop your toast. You're dead.

Trying to listen to your teacher and draw a mustache on your classmate. Both fail. You're a monster.

Trying to drink water and not get it all over your shirt. You're a mess.

A law of nature that men live by and women try to break, usually with success and a smug look.

Trying to eat a sandwich and watch a video. You choke. You're a legend.

Trying to talk to your friend and solve a math problem. You get both wrong. You're a joke.

Trying to drink soda and not spill it on your pants. You're a disaster.