H.S.O.A.B

My cousin got caught by her dad. He just said, 'I guess I’ll have to get used to this.'

At H. S. O. A. B., I peed on the beach. No shame. It was a beach.

I had to run to the store for more chips. My pants were on fire from the sun and my embarrassment.

My friend’s dog ran into the ocean. He just said, 'That’s the least of my problems.'

I tried to sing. It was a disaster. My voice came out like a broken blender.

I tried to kiss my friend’s mom. She gave me a high-five and said, 'You’re a good kid.'

My uncle took off his shirt. He said, 'I’m not hiding anything.'

My neighbor’s cat walked by and stared at me like I was a fool.

I tried to take a selfie, but my phone fell into the water. Now I have to take pictures with a fish.

I yelled at the waves. They just kept coming. I lost.

I tried to dance with a crab. It ran away. I looked like a fool.

I tried to talk to my friend’s dad. He just said, 'You’re not that bad.'

I tried to hug the sand. It didn’t hug back. It just stared.

I tried to sing a love song to the tide. It just laughed at me.

I cried. The sand didn’t care. It just kept being sandy.

I told my mom I was going to sleep with the ocean. She said, 'You’re not even a good liar.'

I tried to run home. I forgot my shoes. I ran barefoot through the street.

I tried to explain to my brother why I was covered in seaweed. He said, 'You look like a monster.'