haitian fire pork

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You blindfold your lover and dump hot sauce in their hair while you scream like a roasting pig and kick them when they come

My girl thought I was just being spicy, then she realized I was being hot and angry

He didn’t see it coming, hot sauce in the hair, scream in the face, and a foot to the gut

She came in the middle of a football game. I think the ref got roasted too.

You rub chili powder on your lover’s face until they’re blindingly red and you two roll around like pigs in a mud pit while you both yell

She thought it was a romantic gesture. Then the chili powder hit her eyes and she yelled louder than I ever have

I got chili in my eyes and my mouth. Now I taste pain and I sound like a pig

He tried to make it romantic. I just made it a war.

You light your lover’s hair on fire with a match and then you both fight like pigs in a bar while you scream and chew each other’s faces

He set my hair on fire. I screamed so loud the bar got a complaint

I lit her hair on fire and then we fought like pigs in a meat locker

We were just arguing. Then he lit my hair on fire and now we’re both screaming and fighting like animals.