hairysplatter

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The messy goo that comes out when you're too hairy and too drunk to care.

My ex's hairysplatter looked like a science experiment gone wrong.

I found hairysplatter on the couch and it was like a crime scene.

He texted me a photo of his hairysplatter and called it 'art.'

Pubic hair so thick it traps the stuff that comes out when you're too busy to wipe.

My brother's hairysplatter is so bad it has its own Instagram page.

She left hairysplatter on my shirt and it was like a tattoo.

I saw his hairysplatter in the shower and it was like a horror movie.

The stuff that oozes out when you're too hairy and too lazy to clean up.

His hairysplatter is so bad it got a nickname: 'the swamp.'

I walked in on her hairysplatter and it was like a surprise party.

He left hairysplatter on the floor and it was like a crime scene, but worse.