hairy acorn

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A pistachio that got stuck in a bird’s nest and thinks it’s a king, probably high on crack and screaming about being a cock.

My neighbor’s dog ate a hairy acorn and now it’s doing the splits in the middle of the street.

I found a hairy acorn in my cereal and it started yelling at me.

The hairy acorn tried to take over my sandwich and failed because it had no teeth.

A nut that got lost in a bird’s nest and thinks it’s a superhero, probably stoned and talking about being a cock.

The hairy acorn saved my life by knocking out the mailman.

I tried to befriend the hairy acorn, but it just threw up on my shoes.

The hairy acorn was arrested for breaking into a hot dog stand.

A pistachio that got stuck in a bird’s nest and thinks it’s a cock, probably wasted and screaming about being a king.

The hairy acorn started a war with my cat over a piece of cheese.

I tried to eat the hairy acorn, and it bit me back.

The hairy acorn became the mayor of my sandwich and taxed me 10 cents.