Hair Straight Back

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3 views · Added 12d ago · 3 definitions

1
A hair straight back is a turbocharged maniac who thinks traffic lights are suggestions, not rules. He’s got a mullet like a bad haircut from hell and screams along to 80s rock while chugging coffee like it’s water.
My cousin Hair Straight Back ran a red light so fast the cop had to chase him on a bike.
He drove through a construction zone like it was a race track.
He passed three cars in one second and yelled, 'I'm not late, I'm fashionably early!'
2
Hair straight back is a guy who thinks his car is a spaceship and his hair is the pilot. He listens to loud 80s music, eats tacos at 3 a. m., and yells at the radio like it owes him money.
He turned his radio up so loud the neighbors called the cops.
He ate a taco while driving and almost hit a mailbox.
He yelled at the radio, 'You’re not a backup singer, you’re a backup plan!'
3
A hair straight back is a man who thinks he’s the fastest man alive and the most handsome man in the universe. He’s got a mullet, a loud radio, and a bad attitude that could kill a cat.
He cut off a bus and said, 'I’m not late, I’m legendary.'
He turned his music up so loud the dogs howled in pain.
He had a fight with a traffic light and won.
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