hagel

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A hagel is a ham bagel. It’s the most basic of basic. Like your grandma’s pants after a long day.

I asked for a plain bagel and got a hagel. My soul died.

My lunch was a hagel. I cried.

That’s not a bagel. That’s a hagel. I’m not even mad, I’m just tired.

When a girl snorts cocaine off a guy’s cock like it’s a snack and then asks for a second serving.

She snorted it off his cock and then asked for a second hit. He was confused.

That girl snorted a line off his wang like it was a business deal.

He was hard as a rock and she snorted it like it was a snack.

A crybaby Nazi who yells ‘hail victory’ like it’s the end of the world and then cries when he loses.

He screamed ‘hail victory’ like he was the last man on Earth.

He yelled ‘hail victory’ and then cried when he lost.

That Nazi cried after he said ‘hail victory’ and it was embarrassing.

A big ol’ ho who steals a hag’s nice purse and ends up with a mouth full of bullets and a lesson learned.

She stole the hag’s purse and got a mouthful of bullets.

That ho tried to steal the purse and got shot in the mouth.

She took the purse and ended up with a mouth full of bullets. Classic.