Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

Getting paid to smother baby animals like they're your long lost lover and you're high on cheap wine.

I’d pay $50 to have this woman cuddle my goat.

This job is why I'm broke and happy.

She hugged my puppy so hard it cried.

2

When you get money for giving baby animals a hug that feels like a full body massage from a drunk grandma.

This lady hugged my kitten so much it fell asleep.

She’s the reason my llama is now my best friend.

I’d let her hug my dog until it dies.

3

A job where you get paid to squeeze baby animals until they squeak like a broken toy.

She hugged my pig so hard it squeaked like a broken toy.

This job is the reason I’m broke and my goat is happy.

I’d let her hug my lamb until it goes to heaven.

4

You get money to squeeze baby animals like they owe you $20 and you’re mad.

She hugged my calf like it stole her lunch money.

This job is why I'm broke and my goat is my new best friend.

I’d pay her to hug my puppy until it passes out.

5

Getting cash for giving baby animals a hug that feels like a slap from a furious toddler.

She hugged my duck like it just broke her favorite toy.

This job is why I’m broke and my goat is now my therapist.

I’d let her hug my lamb until it cries for its mom.

6

When you get paid to squeeze baby animals like they’re your long lost lover and you’re on a bender.

This woman hugged my goat so hard it passed out.

She’s the reason I’m broke and my dog is my new best friend.

I’d let her hug my cow until it becomes a new cow.