hafenize

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1
When you make a total idiot out of yourself by talking like you're the dumbest person ever and then laugh like you just won the dumbest prize ever.
'I literally just ate a sandwich and it changed my life.' *laughs like he just discovered fire* #hafenize
She said 'I'm so bored I could die' and then laughed like she just invented dying.
He told a joke so bad it made the dog cry. Then he laughed like he just beat the dog at chess.
2
When you take a bunch of sailors and make them lick your hand while you rub their nuts like you're giving them a back massage from hell.
'I massaged his nuts so hard he started singing show tunes.' #hafenize
He made the sailors lick his hand like they were in a bet and he won the bet and their dignity.
She made the crew lick her hand and then rubbed their nuts until they begged for mercy.
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