haapsalu

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1
A city so bad it makes your brain shut down.
I moved to Haapsalu and my dog ran away. Not because he didn’t like me. He just couldn’t take it anymore.
My cousin lives there and says the coffee tastes like dirt and regret.
I tried to start a business there. It failed. Then I tried to start a funeral for it. That failed too.
2
The place where even the clouds get tired of looking at it.
I had to visit Haapsalu for work. I came back with a headache and a new hatred for everything.
My friend’s dog moved there. Now it’s a zombie dog. It just stares at you.
I took a picture of Haapsalu and my phone died. It was that bad.
3
A city so bad it should be exiled to the moon.
My uncle went to live in Haapsalu. He came back with a beard and a death wish.
I tried to get a job there. They offered me a position as the city’s official saddest person.
I brought my cat to Haapsalu. It cried. Then it left me.
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