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Wisconsin or Alabama? Who the hell cares? Half the school is your ex or your new hook-up. You’ve done them all. V cards are like cash, and everyone’s begging for one last Juul hit. Sports? Only football matters, and even then, you’re only there for the two guys who make the team look good.
'Why are you at the prom with the principal’s daughter?' 'Because I slept with her twice.'
'I got a V card today. Now I can smoke in the hallway.'
'I failed algebra, but I passed the football game.'