GaGa Surprise!

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when you bring a girl home from the bar and she hits you with a surprise that burns your soul

I thought she was a light drinker. Turns out she’s a full-time lumberjack.

She said she was coming home for a drink. I got a wood chipper.

I asked if she wanted a beer. She brought a chainsaw.

when you think you’re getting a date, but it turns out you’re getting a forest fire

I thought she was cute. She was a wild fire in a miniskirt.

He brought me home. I got a tree hug and a wood chip.

I asked for a nightcap. She handed me an axe.

when you bring a girl home and she’s got more wood than your ex’s furniture store

She said she was single. Turns out she was married to a forest.

He brought me home. I got a tree and a log cabin.

I thought she was coming home for a drink. She brought a lumberjack.