gabbed

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a stupid thing you leave in the rain and it turns into a soggy mess because you're too lazy to grab it before it drowns

Gab left his $500 phone in the rain and now it’s a puddle of broken dreams.

She left her favorite hoodie in the rain and now it smells like wet dog and regret.

Gab left his lunch in the rain and now it’s a soggy disaster that no one wants to eat.

the kind of cool that makes you want to punch someone for not being cool enough

That guy is so gabbed, he walks in and everyone else is instantly sad.

She’s gabbed, and now I’m questioning my whole life.

Gab just walked in and now I feel like a sad, soggy bagel.

those fancy pants from the 60s that only rich people wore and everyone else just thought they looked like a weirdo’s butt

He wore his Gabadine slacks and looked like a rich guy who just stepped out of a time machine.

My uncle wore Gabadine slacks and looked like he was trying too hard to be cool.

She wore her Gabadine slacks and now I think she’s trying to take over the world.

when someone talks so fast it sounds like they're trying to escape a bear and their brain is on fire

Gab talked so fast, it was like he was trying to escape a bear and his brain was on fire.

She gabbed so fast, I couldn’t even understand her, and I’ve had three coffees.

He gabbed so fast, I thought he was trying to speak to a robot.

the kind of man who makes you wish you had a second head so you could kiss both of them at the same time

That Gab is so hot, I’d take him over my ex and his ugly brother combined.

Gab walked in and I instantly wanted to kiss him, his brain, and his weird hat.

He’s a Gab, and I’m just a sad person with no brain.

a guy who’s part French, part charm, and 100% confusing. He’ll laugh at you, then wear the same stupid hat you wear.

Gab laughed at my hat, then wore it the next day like it was a crown.

He said I was stupid, then wore my stupid hat and called me a genius.

Gab said I was ugly, then wore my hat and called me a legend.

the kind of girl who talks too much and thinks everyone else is just waiting for her to finish talking so they can leave.

Gabs talked so much, I was about to leave and take my dog with me.

That Gab is so talkative, I could’ve had a nap while she was talking.

Gabs started talking and now I’m half-dead from her voice.