F's and D's

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3 views · Added 14d ago · 7 definitions

1
Flirty Dirty means you can wink and grab a butt, but you ain't brave enough to throw a punch or slap someone.
Bro, you got F's and D's, so go flirt with that barista, but don't start a fight.
She's got F's and D's, so she can flirt with the whole gym, but she'll run if someone yells at her.
He's got F's and D's, so he can hit on the waitress, but he'll hide if the boss walks in.
2
Fresh to death means you look like a million bucks and everyone wants to know your secret.
That kid walked in and was fresh to death, like he just stepped out of a fashion show.
She’s fresh to death, like she got dressed by a stylist and a magician.
He’s fresh to death, like he just came from a photoshoot and a gym.
3
This measures how hard a man can wiggle his butt when he's trying to get laid.
That guy’s got a strong pelvic thrust, like he was trained by a dancer.
She’s got a weak pelvic thrust, like she’s never had a real man before.
He wiggles like he’s trying to seduce a statue.
4
F 3-D is a rebellion against movie theaters charging too much for fake depth, like they’re trying to trick kids into buying popcorn.
F 3-D! I'm tired of paying $20 for a movie that looks like it was made by a kid with a phone.
F 3-D! That movie was worse than my last relationship.
F 3-D! I’d rather watch a cat video in 4D than that garbage.
5
Fatty Pimpin Daddy is when you're rich, fat, and you still think you're the king of the block.
That guy’s a Fatty Pimpin Daddy, like he owns the block and eats three pizzas for breakfast.
She’s a Fatty Pimpin Daddy, like she drives a limo and eats donuts for dinner.
He’s a Fatty Pimpin Daddy, like he’s got a mansion and still eats out of a fast-food bag.
6
Feel Like Dog Shit is when you’re so tired and sick, you’d rather eat a dog’s breakfast than get out of bed.
I’ve got Feel Like Dog Shit, like I’ve been hit by a bus and a mosquito at the same time.
She’s got Feel Like Dog Shit, like she’s been stuck in a car with her brother for three days.
He’s got Feel Like Dog Shit, like he’s been living in a trash can for a month.
7
This is just a fancy way of saying who can get into a place, like it’s some kind of secret club.
They’re checking for Male/Female/Veteran/Disabled, like it’s some kind of secret society.
He’s Male/Female/Veteran/Disabled, like he’s got a badge for every category.
She’s Male/Female/Veteran/Disabled, like she’s been in every war and every party.
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