F.O.C.K.E.R.S.

My cousin tried to eat a whole pizza for breakfast and called it 'a holy offering to the gods of grease.'

At the county fair, they dressed their cows in tuxedos and called it 'the last supper.'

He got kicked out of church for wearing a hat made of chicken feathers.

They threw a football through a window and yelled, 'That’s how you make a statement!'

At the gas station, they fought over the last bag of chips like it was the last piece of the Titanic.

They tried to start a band called 'The Pudding Punks' and played with spoons.

They took a dump in the principal’s office and called it 'a strategic surprise.'

They tried to run for class president and brought a live chicken as their campaign promise.

They named their pet raccoon 'Sir Wafflebottom' and made him their vice president.

They wore socks with sandals and called it 'the ultimate fashion statement.'

They threw a whole chicken in the lake and screamed, 'That’s how you fish!'

They tried to start a fire with a hair dryer and a bag of chips.

They fought in the cafeteria with ketchup and called it 'a battle of the sauces.'

They tried to take over the school by wearing pajamas to class every day.

They brought a cow to the prom and called it 'the ultimate date.'

They tried to build a robot out of Legos and called it 'the future of redneck tech.'

They sang in the hallway at 3 a. m. and called it 'a musical revolution.'

They threw a football at the teacher and said, 'That’s how you show respect!'