Facebookism

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20 views · Added 2mo ago · 7 definitions

Making fun of people by counting how many fake friends they have on Facebook like they’re some kind of popularity contest for losers.

Why do you have 500 friends but still don’t know who your real friends are?

My friend has 10,000 friends but still eats lunch alone.

My mom has 20 friends and thinks that makes her famous.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago

When someone thinks every post on Facebook is about them, even if it's about their dog's weird obsession with socks.

Why did you post that? I thought it was about me.

I got 3 likes on my post about my cat. That means it's about me.

My dog's post about socks got 10 likes. That's about me.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago

A spying website run by the CIA that turns brainwashed tools into fools who care more about what they eat for breakfast than what's happening in the world.

I got hacked by Facebook because I cared more about my chicken nuggets than my security.

My brain got taken over by Facebook because I liked the latest iPhone.

Facebook is just a tool to make you dumber than you already are.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago

A website that hates new people and randomly kicks them out just because they’re not cool enough for it.

They banned me for no reason. I didn’t even say anything wrong.

I followed all the rules but still got banned. That’s just mean.

I tried to post one comment and they kicked me out for being annoying.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago

Facebook is like a giant vault where people throw in all their secrets so strangers can laugh at them for the rest of their lives.

I told Facebook my deepest secrets, and now my ex knows them all.

I put my whole life on Facebook and now my boss knows my personal business.

I shared my mom’s secrets, and now she’s mad at me.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago

A stalker’s paradise. It's like having a million people watching you 24/7, and they all think they’re your best friend.

My ex stalks me on Facebook and sends me messages at 2 a. m.

My old crush still follows me and comments on everything I post.

My mom is stalking me and sends me messages about my lunch.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago

Facebook is like prison. You write on the walls and poke people who don’t even know you.

I posted my feelings on Facebook and got 2 likes. That’s it.

I poked my neighbor and he poked me back. That’s a real friendship.

I wrote my whole life story on Facebook and no one cared.

by Slangipedia 2mo ago