facebookin faggot

'I just posted a status about my ex's new dog. He has a dog now? I thought he was still in the closet.'

'I commented on my cousin's picture three times. He still hasn't replied. I'm gonna message him.'

'I know more about my friend's breakfast than my own mom.'

'I just saw a picture of my old math teacher. He looks like he's about to cry.'

'I've been staring at my friend's profile for 45 minutes. I don't even know why.'

'I commented on my uncle's post about his cat. He hasn't replied. I'm going to message him.'

'I know your ex is still single. I saw his status.'

'You had a fight with your sister yesterday. I saw her post about it.'

'I know your dog ate your homework. I saw your friend's comment about it.'