facebookiando

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2 views · Added 3d ago · 5 definitions

A person who stares at Facebook so hard their eyes turn blue and they crash into a mailbox because they forgot they were driving.

I was so busy looking at my ex's new dog, I ran into a fire hydrant.

I checked my feed and missed my bus. Now I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere with my mom.

I saw a meme about my uncle and crashed into a tree. My car is now a pancake.

by Slangipedia 3d ago

Someone who lives on Facebook so much they forget they're alive and end up in the hospital because they looked at a post instead of a doctor.

I was so distracted by my cousin's vacation pics, I forgot to breathe and got a panic attack.

I saw a post about a pizza and drove through a red light. Now I'm grounded.

I checked my feed instead of my medicine and now I'm in the ER.

by Slangipedia 3d ago

A person who's so addicted to Facebook they think it's a real person and end up walking into traffic because they were talking to a post.

I was arguing with my boss's post and got hit by a bus.

I tried to reply to a comment and walked into a wall. My face is now a painting.

I was too busy liking my friend's new cat, I didn't see the truck.

by Slangipedia 3d ago

A person who's so deep in Facebook they think they're in a movie and end up missing their life because they're too busy watching other people's lives.

I watched my friend's vacation video and forgot to eat. Now I'm hungry and sad.

I was so busy watching my cousin's live stream, I missed my flight and got stuck in a hotel.

I thought my feed was a movie, so I watched it all day and now I'm out of my mind.

by Slangipedia 3d ago

A person who spends so much time on Facebook they think it's their real life and end up getting fired because they were texting their ex instead of working.

I was texting my ex and got caught by my boss. Now I'm out of a job.

I answered a post instead of my boss and got a warning.

I was so busy liking my friend's post, I didn't do my work. Now I'm in trouble.

by Slangipedia 3d ago