facebook wit

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2 views · Added 3d ago · 2 definitions

1
The smug, half-baked jokes people think up after staring at their phone for 30 minutes like it’s the key to life. It’s basically the worst version of actual conversation because they take forever to say something that’s barely funny.
I posted a meme about my dog and it took me 20 minutes to write a comment about how the dog was basically my ex.
She spent 15 minutes typing a response to a friend’s post that just said ‘lol’
He thought about his reply for 28 minutes and it was just ‘I guess’.
2
When you have so many fake friends on Facebook that it’s like your account is a party you don’t want to be at. So you make a new one and only invite the people who actually care about you, or at least don’t steal your pizza.
My old Facebook had 500 friends, 498 of them were people I’ve never met.
I made a new account because my old one was like a group chat with strangers.
I only added my real friends so they wouldn’t see my embarrassing posts.
xs