Facebook reconnaissance

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Stalking someone online with a phone and a bad attitude to find out all their secrets before you trash talk them.

I looked up my ex’s profile and found out she’s dating my best friend. I texted him: 'You’re dead.'

I checked my crush’s Facebook and saw he’s got a dog named 'Buttface.' I called him a ‘disgusting human being.’

I saw my neighbor’s mom’s posts and realized she’s a witch. I told my brother: 'We’re gonna burn her.'

Using Facebook like a detective to dig up dirt on people so you can embarrass them in public.

I found out my teacher’s dog ate her homework. I posted it on the class group chat. She cried.

I saw my cousin’s ex had a tattoo of my cousin’s face. I sent him a text: 'You’re a beast.'

I saw my dad’s Facebook and realized he’s got a second life. I told my mom: 'He’s a total fraud.'

Looking up people on Facebook like they owe you money so you can mock them for their bad choices.

I saw my friend’s profile and found out he’s got 12 cats. I called him: 'You’re a monster.'

I looked up my boss’s page and saw he posted a picture of his pet goat. I told my coworkers: 'He’s a fool.'

I saw my sister’s ex had a beard and a tattoo of a chicken. I texted her: 'He’s a total weirdo.'