facebook masturbation

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1
You're doing Facebook masturbation when you 'like' your own stupid post just to feel important.
I posted a picture of my cat and immediately 'liked' it. What's wrong with me?
She posted a link to her favorite movie and 'liked' it like it was a compliment.
He posted a status saying 'I'm tired' and 'liked' it because he thought it was funny.
2
Facebook masturbation is when you post something and then 'like' it like it’s a confession.
He posted a selfie and 'liked' it like it was a religious experience.
She posted a link to a song and 'liked' it like it was her life’s work.
He posted a status saying 'I’m bored' and 'liked' it like it was a secret.
3
A Facebook masturbator is someone who stares at other people’s pictures and gets hard.
He stared at his ex’s vacation pictures for an hour and got a wood.
She looked at her crush’s profile and had a little fun on the side.
He saw a guy’s workout pic and went to the gym just to flex.
4
Facebook masturbation is when you 'like' your own stuff like it’s a habit you can’t break.
She 'liked' her own status so many times, it felt like a addiction.
He 'liked' his own picture like it was the only thing that made him feel alive.
They 'liked' their own wall post so much, it became a daily ritual.
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