facebook dumper

2 views · Added 3d ago · 3 definitions

A person who stares at Facebook on their phone while pooping in the toilet, like they’re trying to beat the world record for the longest dump.

I just saw my boss on Facebook while I was taking a dump. He’s gonna know I was there.

I posted a selfie on Facebook while I was still halfway done with my dump. I’m a legend.

My phone died mid-dump. I was so mad, I posted a rant about it on Facebook.

Somebody who checks Facebook on their phone in the bathroom like it’s a holy place and they’re the chosen one.

I checked Facebook while I was on the can and saw my ex. My dump got stuck.

I posted a status about my dump on Facebook. Now everyone knows my business.

I got a notification from Facebook while I was on the can. I had to take a second dump.

A person who sits on the can and spends more time on Facebook than they do actually pooping.

I spent 10 minutes on Facebook while I was on the can. I got a notification from my mom. I got distracted.

I was pooping and my phone died. I screamed like I was being murdered.

I posted a photo of my dump on Facebook. My coworkers laughed at me.