facebook deuce

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When you take a dump and decide to scroll through Facebook like it's your full-time job.

'I just pooped and saw my ex's face again. I'm not done yet.'

'Facebook is more important than my bowel movement.'

'I’m not going number two. I’m going number two and doing Facebook deuce.'

Sitting on the toilet like it’s a throne and posting on Facebook like you’re the king.

'I just posted my bun on Facebook. I’m not even done yet.'

'Facebook deuce is my new favorite hobby.'

'I took a dump and posted a status. That’s how I roll.'

Using the toilet as a distraction while you spam Facebook like it’s your second job.

'I’m not pooping. I’m pooping and Facebooking.'

'I posted three times while I was on the toilet. I’m proud.'

'Facebook deuce is when you forget you’re pooping because you’re too busy liking your own posts.'