facebook creeped out

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a super annoying feeling that hits you when your ex posts too many selfies and statuses about their new life

My ex just posted 12 selfies today. I'm going to die.

Why does my ex know I had a burger for lunch?

They even tagged me in a photo with their new boyfriend. I feel like I'm being tortured.

when your face is melting because your friend's cousin's pet parrot is following you on Facebook

Why is my friend's cousin's parrot following me? That’s the worst.

I had to unfollow a parrot. What even is life?

My parrot stalker just posted a video of me sleeping. I'm embarrassed.

the worst feeling in the world when you see your mom's 12-year-old friend's pet goldfish liking your posts

My mom’s 12-year-old friend’s goldfish just liked my post. That’s not even real.

I get more likes from a goldfish than my crush.

Why is my goldfish stalking me on Facebook? I didn’t even know it could type.