facebake

Fresh Trending

2 views · Added 4d ago · 4 definitions

When you’re so high you think you’re the king of the universe and you can’t even focus because your brain is melting like a burnt waffle.

I just ate three waffles and I feel like I’m king of the world.

My brain is like a melted ice cream cone and I can’t stop laughing.

I think my mom is the queen of the universe and I’m her royal advisor.

Getting up, making coffee, and logging on to Facebook so stoned you think your friends are your long-lost cousins from Mars.

I woke up, had coffee, and now I’m texting my friend like we’re besties from another planet.

I just posted a status saying my coffee is better than my ex.

I told my mom I’m going to Mars because my Facebook is telling me to.

When you post a picture of your breakfast like it’s the most important thing ever and you’re trying to act like you’re famous.

I took a photo of my pancakes and posted it like it’s a Nobel Prize.

I said my toast is better than my teacher’s grading system.

I posted my cereal and now my friends think I’m a food influencer.

Smoking some weed so strong it’s like a dragon came to your face, then you go on Facebook and comment on everything like you’re a god.

I commented on my friend’s cat picture and said it’s the cutest thing since the invention of pizza.

I said my dog is better than my teacher and now my dog is famous.

I told my friend’s mom she looks like a movie star and now she’s my hero.